Blogg #4

Part 1: How has your ability to communicate changed over time?

It took maturity to realize that effective communication was vital. I learned this especially as an adult and more importantly in relationships. I was probably not a good communicator until two distinctive things happened in my life 1. I was in my first real relationship and 2. I became a father. Before these two events I communicated with little effectiveness. I said what I needed to say to just bare scrape by and that was it. I didn’t communicate with much detail in any area of my life as child. I have never been one to be detailed in conversation, responses, emotions or directions. This changed when I was in my first real relationship. It was very important to me that my girlfriend at the time realized when she hurt me or when I thought she was incorrect. The only way she would be able to know these things is if I told her. . . . effectively. I learned that I could not hold her responsible for something that I didn’t effectively communicate. So in an effort to not have my feelings hurt or to be misunderstood in our relationship, I began to talk and talk and talk to some more. Although our relationship didn’t last, it proved to be a good foundation and good practice for relationships to come.

Also I learned as a father that children cannot read your mind. They must be told of your expectations and the difference between right and wrong. Non verbal communication does not usually work with small children. I had to be able talk and reprimand my children when needed. So when I became a father, I quickly learned this communication trait was of the utmost importance to me. It was also important to me that my children respected my authority. They were able to do this by how and what I communicated to them.

Part 2: How has your method of communication changed over time?

As mentioned in part one, my communication has become more verbal as I aged. I used to answer questions from teachers and my parents with just enough information to get them to leave me alone. As an adult, I have learned that the more information I communicate the better the response from others. I talk more now. I send dozens of text messages a day. I constantly communicate with people via email. 5 years ago that was nonexistent in my life. Also I have a facebook page that I update every once and awhile.  I add pictures. I also sometimes post what’s going on in my life. With the aid of this social networking site, I update 200 people at time. 10 years ago there was no such thing as mass email or mass texting or updating your status for the entire world to see. So when I was a child, if I wanted someone to know I was having a bad day I would have to tell a person that by the spoken word. Today I can tell everyone I know by just sending a text, an update or an email. Wow, times have changed.